It’s only been less than two months after your first birthday and what a ride it’s been.
It’s like a switch came on when you hit one year old and suddenly, everything started happening at once. Once you started having more understanding of the world around you, you were insatiable in your desire to learn, to touch and experience everything, and to observe how things work.
Everyone’s starting to be quite careful about what they do around you because many times, you see it one time and then try to replicate it later on.
You’re now walking around at full speed, always looking like you’re going way too fast for your current grasp of balance but you hardly fall nowadays even though you walk like a drunken duck...a very fast moving drunken duck.
You absolutely love your toy corner we’ve set up in the living room with a cute little table and chair. You refuse to let anyone else sit on the chair, even mommy, screaming and pulling her off when she dared try one day. And no matter how sleepy you are after getting home, you always have to visit your little corner and play your favourite toys for awhile before waddling off to the bedroom to sleep.
You adore books. And you never, ever get bored of the same old books. Every day, you’ll bring me your favourite selection, plonk yourself on my lap and insist I read it through. At least 3 times. Each. It doesn’t matter how busy I am or what the timing is, you need me to read to you even if it’s in the morning and I’m rushing to get ready for work.
In fact, this morning, you woke up early, went out to the living room to pick up your favourite book, then climbed on the bed and proceeded to keep knocking the spine of the book on my nose to wake me up to read to you.
This was before 7am. I was sleeping. The book you kept bonking on my nose? It was hardcover. And painful.
Which starts to give you a bit of a picture of my little conundrum.
I think you’re pretty damn smart and it makes me very happy. I get so proud of you every time I see your rapid increase in comprehension, learning so efficiently and picking up all the physical developmental milestones seemingly effortlessly.
But it’s also freakin' tiring. (Forgive my language but you're likely never to read these letters until you can make your own decisions on what's right or wrong...if ever.)
You have boundless, boundless energy, and you never stop to rest unless you’re knocked out, sleeping. You’re so fierce and so stubborn and so impatient. Everything needs to be done your way...right away. You even insist on trying to feed yourself with a spoon even though it’s painfully obvious that you’re a long way off getting the angles right and by the time the spoon reaches your lips, it's empty.
And at the same time, you're so very, very beautiful. You're your own person, seemingly making your own decisions on what you want to do and who you want to be. You're assertive, confident, fearless. You've got your own cheeky sense of humour which no one taught you but it cracks me up every time. Unless you're laughing because you pinched my nipple really hard and I squealed out loud. No one taught you that either.
Let me tell you a secret. You're everything I ever wanted in a daughter. There's not much more I could ask for. I complain about how much energy it takes but to be honest, you're perfect to me.
Even if you still wake up at least twice a night...
I can't wait to see what else you'll learn in the coming months. Your mommy and I don't even have the time or energy to teach you anything right now. Much of what you're learning is through your own observation and practical experience.
My prayer and hope is that on the days ahead that you may need some direction or, God forbid, discipline, that you will soften your incredibly feisty nature to receive the necessary instruction.
And on my end, I commit to never discipline you while I'm angry and to wait until I'm calm. I always thought I would have no trouble disciplining you but up till today, I still can't bring myself to...and you and I know there have been ppllleeeeennntttyyy of opportunities.
Everything I do, I will do out of love for you.
Love,
Dad
0 comments:
Post a Comment